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View Full Version : suggestions please.


quivers
09-30-2006, 05:54 AM
OK, story is I am divorced, he cheated multiple times. 4 or 5 i actually know about and have names. He left moved in with the bartender from his favorite watering hole. Oh the I love you, not in love with you story. Never admitted to cheating even when I had proof. denial is not just a river in AFRICA. So he even lied about living with her, after he moved out .

The problem, His GF is such a nasty bitch, and crazy. She called me ask me what she ever did to make me dislike her so much :eek: I told her, umm lets see you were fucking my husband! the father of my son, who is now gone his sons heart is broken he just wants his daddy back home. and you want me to be your friend? I do not pick friends who cheat on their spouses. Not my kind of people. So she calls, harrassing me, giving me her opinion on ever thing I do. The last incident was this week. I went to pick up my son from his dad's, I go to the door ring the bell, she comes out. he comes out, then here comes my son. I say goodbye to them walking away she says to me.

HEY... IT WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE IF YOU WOULD HAVE HAD THE BOY CALL HIS DAD ON HIS BIRTHDAY. :eek: I SENT MY SON TO MY VAN AND i TURNED TO HER AND SPOKE. I use to do that, But not one time since he pointing my finger at the X left, has he done 1 thing for me. Nothing on mothersday/birthday. I do not expect it, He wouldn't pay his child support, still doesn't help with medical ect. Moral of the story you get what you give, you give no respect, you get none.

I sent him some school pictures of his son, in a card at easter. SHE came unglued because i had sent him a card. called my cell phone 7 times leaving me nasty grams, about how I do not respect their relationship. she has followed me around town. mostly I just ignore her, but some times I just want to scream. I want nothing to do with her, I told the x. keep her out of my life. shes crazy. he is so pussy whipped, she does the talking for him.

considering moving away, but the X is gonna fight me.

WildeSpirit
09-30-2006, 07:37 AM
I think if she was following me around town, I'd be getting a restraining order.

dude
09-30-2006, 12:15 PM
I asked my ex to stop sending me cards/gifts from my child. It made my wife uncomfortable, so I stopped it. I didn't let them two of them go at it in the front yard because as much as they say it is, it's none of the new girlfriend's damned buiness. Your ex needs to work out the ground rules with you as far as what is expected.

Tell this bitch to mind her own.

You and your husband have no responsibility to each other aside from making the child feel like he is being raised in a loving, normal environment. If he can't see that the new girl is running interferance on this, then it needs to be pointed out to him so he can re-evaluate his priorities.

that's my take, anyway.

quivers
09-30-2006, 02:56 PM
They have been together since before we parted, she suffers from emotional problems is what the X told my son. After she made the both of them sleep in the basement. My son is not suppose to talk to her about anything that upsets her/ ( me).

I have had this discussion with him over and over. He sees no problem. LOVE is blind and stupid in this case. I have told HER straight up, what happens in their house unless it affects my son is none of my concern. If there is a problem she needs to address it with him, then he can bring it to my attention if he feels it is important. I have nothing to say to her and I will not engage her in anyway. I have caused no problem for them I have let that part of my life go. they are each others problem not mine. He owes me thousands of dollars I would gladly just forget about it if they would let me alone. My peace of mind means more to me then money.

Truth is I feel sorry for him, and my son does as well. He told me mommy I do not like the way she treats my daddy. he is 9 what do you say?

Mom
09-30-2006, 03:17 PM
Your son does not need to be exposed to this woman and your X should recognize that fact If he wants to see his son he should do it away from this woman on neutral ground.

dude
09-30-2006, 03:25 PM
Your son does not need to be exposed to this woman and your X should recognize that fact If he wants to see his son he should do it away from this woman on neutral ground.
That would be incredibly difficult to get a court order for. Q, start keeping a log of all the dates and incidents, such as sleeping in the basement/arguments in front of the child, etc. you can build a case for the order on those. your ex will hate you, but that's not really what's important here. if your ex isn't mature enough to protect his child from this crap, then it is up to you and the courts.

muffdiver13
10-01-2006, 07:32 PM
As he is not paying his support, he will be hard pressed to take you to court over moving. What's he going to do, stand up in front of the judge and scream about his rights whe he hasn't upheld his responsibilities? Since you will probably never see the back support owed, use it as a bargining chip. Tell him you will forget the debt if he doesn't fight the move.

quivers
10-02-2006, 06:52 AM
he will not willingly pay his support I had to garnish his wages! he drained the 401k money I was suppose to get half of. and refuses to help with uncovered medical expenses. My sons meds alone are over 100. bucks a month, and that is with a copay.
But he just bought a new 4 bedroom house with a inground pool, a new jeep, hehehehehe, ect ect... But see I know how he works, he charms the women, with money he really don't have, runs up the CC , It just a matter of time till his bubble burst. He lives beyond his means! And she has filed bankruptcy 2 with her X husband.
I ran a background check on her. hehehehe and her x made 2 the money mine does.
I'm gonna just let them go, burn their own asses.
Oh and if you ask him, he wanted to be garnished!

ET
10-02-2006, 07:13 AM
Why don't you just start having him pick up and drop off your son from your house? Then if she comes along and starts any shit, it will be on YOUR property and it's a hell of a lot easier to get a restraining order to keep her off your property.

And Muff's right - if he wants to take you to court over the move, your attorney will have a field day with the failure to pay child support (as long as it was court ordered).

muffdiver13
10-02-2006, 08:48 AM
Why don't you just start having him pick up and drop off your son from your house? Then if she comes along and starts any shit, it will be on YOUR property and it's a hell of a lot easier to get a restraining order to keep her off your property.

And Muff's right - if he wants to take you to court over the move, your attorney will have a field day with the failure to pay child support (as long as it was court ordered).
ET has a very good idea, let him come to you. You can tell to leave her in the car and they have no choice.

TheGrizz
10-02-2006, 11:18 AM
OK, story is I am divorced, he cheated multiple times. 4 or 5 i actually know about and have names. He left moved in with the bartender from his favorite watering hole. Oh the I love you, not in love with you story. Never admitted to cheating even when I had proof. denial is not just a river in AFRICA. So he even lied about living with her, after he moved out .

The problem, His GF is such a nasty bitch, and crazy. She called me ask me what she ever did to make me dislike her so much :eek: I told her, umm lets see you were fucking my husband! the father of my son, who is now gone his sons heart is broken he just wants his daddy back home. and you want me to be your friend? I do not pick friends who cheat on their spouses. Not my kind of people. So she calls, harrassing me, giving me her opinion on ever thing I do. The last incident was this week. I went to pick up my son from his dad's, I go to the door ring the bell, she comes out. he comes out, then here comes my son. I say goodbye to them walking away she says to me.

HEY... IT WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE IF YOU WOULD HAVE HAD THE BOY CALL HIS DAD ON HIS BIRTHDAY. :eek: I SENT MY SON TO MY VAN AND i TURNED TO HER AND SPOKE. I use to do that, But not one time since he pointing my finger at the X left, has he done 1 thing for me. Nothing on mothersday/birthday. I do not expect it, He wouldn't pay his child support, still doesn't help with medical ect. Moral of the story you get what you give, you give no respect, you get none.

I sent him some school pictures of his son, in a card at easter. SHE came unglued because i had sent him a card. called my cell phone 7 times leaving me nasty grams, about how I do not respect their relationship. she has followed me around town. mostly I just ignore her, but some times I just want to scream. I want nothing to do with her, I told the x. keep her out of my life. shes crazy. he is so pussy whipped, she does the talking for him.

considering moving away, but the X is gonna fight me.

OMG!!! there is some very compelling evidence here that leads me to believe your husband's GF was once MY WIFE!!!!:eek:

quivers
10-02-2006, 01:36 PM
Well the one thing I did try and it kept her out of my hair for 6 months... Everytime she called me and got nasty over all her petty crappola. My BF would call the X and give him shit! he told the X I don't want to do this, and you don't want to do this. So keep her out of MY hair, and all will be fine. Then he told them the legal side of what I could do to keep her away. from not only me but my son as well! The problem is I do not have the funds to go after them. I would really like to settle it between the 2 of us. But he will not meet with me to talk about it. I guess I will just wait gather my information keep it current and see what happens.

I wanted to appeal to the man, and he just doesn't exsist anymore!
Thanks to all of you.. :) big hugs from Quiver.

muffdiver13
10-02-2006, 08:53 PM
Well the one thing I did try and it kept her out of my hair for 6 months... Everytime she called me and got nasty over all her petty crappola. My BF would call the X and give him shit! he told the X I don't want to do this, and you don't want to do this. So keep her out of MY hair, and all will be fine. Then he told them the legal side of what I could do to keep her away. from not only me but my son as well! The problem is I do not have the funds to go after them. I would really like to settle it between the 2 of us. But he will not meet with me to talk about it. I guess I will just wait gather my information keep it current and see what happens.

I wanted to appeal to the man, and he just doesn't exsist anymore!
Thanks to all of you.. :) big hugs from Quiver.
Good luck and keep us updated.

johnnybegood
10-04-2006, 07:47 AM
Get a restraining order... and OBTW, you are entittled to 1/2 the balance of the 401k on the date of the divorce finalized... So its still you money and his liability! :cool:

muffdiver13
10-04-2006, 08:31 AM
Get a restraining order... and OBTW, you are entittled to 1/2 the balance of the 401k on the date of the divorce finalized... So its still you money and his liability! :cool:
While true, an you get blood from a turnip?

Cleopatra
10-04-2006, 11:28 AM
I breezed through this thread fast so maybe I missed some facts. My outlook:
1) you are divorced, I'm sure your decree states no member of the opposite sex over night when the child is present. Your X is not married to this woman.
2) he pays no child support, is he ordered to do so? If so, call your state child support office, open the case, and they will help you collect. Cheaper than a private atty.
3) File a restraining order against the bitch if she's following you, making threats etc.
4) be supportave of your son, and do your best NOT to discuss issue's in front of him. He's only 9, keep in mind all kids love both parents regardless if the parent is a piece of shit or not.
5) If the X wants to see the boy, demand it only be when the bitch is not present or refuse to take him there.

Good luck.......Been there done that myself

quivers
10-07-2006, 05:58 PM
For child support I have already had him garnished twice, he switched jobs and I had to refile it. Out of my own pocket!
The 401 K money I am working on, I think they ,the company made a mistake.. and let him withdrawl money after the fact. The account is now frozen but they refuse to give me any information. I have sent them a copy of the judges order and they still will not do anything. But they did tell me he has to sign off on it and he will not do so. And as far I know the money is almost gone.

I have tried to keep this all under wraps as far as my son goes. But on his dad's end is another story. He does not like her(gf) and she talks crap about me in front of him, I have discussed this with the X and he just tells me he will handle it. LMAO.. She says jump he says how high darlin!!!!!

muffdiver13
10-07-2006, 08:17 PM
For child support I have already had him garnished twice, he switched jobs and I had to refile it. Out of my own pocket!
The 401 K money I am working on, I think they ,the company made a mistake.. and let him withdrawl money after the fact. The account is now frozen but they refuse to give me any information. I have sent them a copy of the judges order and they still will not do anything. But they did tell me he has to sign off on it and he will not do so. And as far I know the money is almost gone.

I have tried to keep this all under wraps as far as my son goes. But on his dad's end is another story. He does not like her(gf) and she talks crap about me in front of him, I have discussed this with the X and he just tells me he will handle it. LMAO.. She says jump he says how high darlin!!!!!
As to the 401K, put your request in writing, then age their refusal in writing, also get them to put that they let him withdraw the monies when they should have frozen it. Present all this to the judge and see if you can get a court order directly for the funds. At the very least their refusal should allow the judge to hit them with contempt of court charges. Good luck.

quivers
10-08-2006, 06:15 AM
MUFF,
I have sent a letter, certified mail.. twice with copies of everything including the divorce decree, The judges order. My attorney did this as well when the divorce was final. I call this company every monday with the 401k money, hehehehe hoping they get sick of hearing from me and tell me something.

muffdiver13
10-08-2006, 11:21 AM
I know it may cost, but can you get the refusal from the company before the judge. Nothing like a fine/jail time for contempt to get things moving.

quivers
10-08-2006, 04:58 PM
In my letter to this company, I ask them to respond back to me in writing. They would not or have not. I even sent a self addressed stamped envelope! Thus the phone calls, I have made to New York, which I have kept all my bills with these calls on them in my file. I guess It will have to be an attorney, looking as if it's gonna cost me to get it. Nothing I've done so far is helping.

The X has already been in contempt of court 5 times I think and nothing happens. he is like "teflon don" I swear! :mad:

muffdiver13
10-08-2006, 05:17 PM
In my letter to this company, I ask them to respond back to me in writing. They would not or have not. I even sent a self addressed stamped envelope! Thus the phone calls, I have made to New York, which I have kept all my bills with these calls on them in my file. I guess It will have to be an attorney, looking as if it's gonna cost me to get it. Nothing I've done so far is helping.

The X has already been in contempt of court 5 times I think and nothing happens. he is like "teflon don" I swear! :mad:
Wish I coould offer more. They need to jsut toss his ass in jail untin he comes up withthe money!