PassAroundGirl
03-24-2007, 06:46 PM
Okay, here it goes. As you already know my name is Michelle. I have fought a huge battle with a little known or recognized addiction known as "sex addiction" I know, this sounds sort of cute and fun but I assure you it has been anything but fun.
This started as far back as my 12th birthday. I was having sex with some girls living on my street and my drive to do was more then I could deal with. Being with these girls sexually was on my mind from the time I woke up until the time I went to bed. Sadly, I lived in a horribly controlling Catholic home and had to hide even thinking about sex from my Mom and dad. One day, after having an especially good time with the girl who lived across the street, I went home and continued the fun myself. I was masturbating with my electric tooth brush and my Mom walked in on me. She was absolutely brutal about what she saw. I was forced to go upstairs and tell my father who then made me call my grandparents and tell them. As if that was not enough, I was taken right to church and pushed into a confessional. When this was all said and done, I felt so horribly guilty that I swore off my sexual feelings as evil forever. I was so upset, I washed vagina out with rubbing alcohol. To this day, I can recall how badly that burned. It hurt so bad I almost passed out.
Needless to say, my sexuality went under ground. I learned to hide every sexual thought, feeling and idea. This was a very complicated for a girl just starting puberty. Sex is all I thought about, as is the case with most teens. Unfortunately for me, the second I thought about sex is the same second the guilt and fear came in. So, the stage was set. Have sex but hide it, lie about it and deny it. Step 1 to any addiction. Also, as we all know, the more your not supposed to do something, the more you want to do it. Sex was quickly becoming the central focus of my entire life.
As this budding addiction and I entered high school, the problem really started to show it's ugly head. I was having sex almost daily with guys from school. I was having sex in cars, empty rooms in the school, at guys homes during lunch and any other place we could find. I was even letting guys take turns on me as early as 14 and 15 years old. I was incredibly excited about what I was doing but the guilt was killing me inside. I had to dam near develop a second personality to rid myself of the guilt. I was the good girl at home and in situations in which I was supposed to be "proper". Then, I would go to school and become a totally different person. I was so good at it that one life never crossed into the other. I had successfully split my personalities. As high school went on, my sexual activities became more and more aggressive. I skipped both my proms to simply go have sex. I was having sex with basically any girl and any guy that would sleep with me. I had no limitations to my sexual conduct. I was completely out of control.
After high school, I married the first guy that asked. Bill Tygart. Sadly, during this year long marriage I simply had no idea how to stop having sex with people. Not to mention my personality was so spit I did not even view having sex with my husband's friends as wrong. When I was with Bill, I was with Bill. When I was with other men, I was with other men. The two worlds never met one another. Tragically, Bill found out about what I was doing and killed himself. Of course, I was able to separate myself from having any responsibility in this and turned into his problem. "Only cowards commit suicide" is how I relieved myself of fault and blame. Fearing being alone and needing sex and approval, the day after the funeral I invited some old boyfriends to my house to keep me company. One of them was not an old boyfriend but rather a guy I had met at my wedding. His name was Dennis. He was married to a girl named Barbara. That night, I had sex with Dennis several times. One whole day after my husband killed himself for how I conducted myself and hear I am doing it again. Dennis and I dated for a few weeks then Dennis offered a three-way with his wife. I accepted the invitation and spent the weekend with them at their place. Her and I had awesome sex and our three-way sex was stellar. I decided to move in with Dennis and Barbara and be a full time 3 way. Six months later Dennis and Barbara divorced over money matters and I married Dennis.
About a year later Dennis and I met a really hot girl named Shawna Garlow. She was 17 and just beautiful. We both fell in love with her and we moved her in. We were a three-way for over five years. Sadly, this is also when my affairs started again. I got a job as a Denver Sheriff Officer and started the academy. Half way though I met a man named Oscar Ramos. A married man with a few kids. I started having sex with Oscar during lunch breaks and after work. To arrange this I was lying to Dennis and Shawna like a demon. I cheated and lied every day for a month. I knew I was risking my job but I never even considered stopping the affair until he asked me to leave Dennis and Shawna and move in with him. He was going to divorce his wife for me. Then the two worlds collided and I wanted out. Of course Oscar had no intention of stopping and became aggressive and violent with me. It all ended with him pushing my car off the road and us drawing guns on one another. To say the least, I was out of a job that day. My first really good job pissed away to have sex with people I did not even especially like. Dennis and Shawna stood by during this time of court battles and media attention and I am not entirely sure why.
After the Denver Sheriff department, I got a job as a 911 dispatcher. Of course, I had hoped that my affairs were over. After all, one husband had killed himself already and the second husband was already horribly hurt by my affair with Oscar. No one would continue with this insanity right? WRONG. As a dispatcher, I started affairs with two people at the same time in the same office. Of course, I was lying to Dennis and Shawna about having sex at work again and I was lying to both people at work about the other. I was having sex with a girl named Michelle Morris and a guy named "rader". It is not hard to predict that these affairs went bad and the job exploded once again. Now I was explaining to Dennis and Michelle about yet another set of affairs. At this point, Shawna pretty much left. She was done with the lies and troubles. Dennis stayed married to me for some reason I cannot fully explain.
I did not work for the next 2 years. I just stayed home and did occasional adult type jobs such as videos, live cams and even the occasional escort call. None of this was cheating as Dennis knew and was OK with the idea. This is really the hard part to explain. Dennis was never sexually possessive of me. I have NEVER needed to cheat. Dennis would have allowed me to have sex with anyone I wanted to. I needed only ask. Why risk cheating when you can just ask? I have no idea. Addictions are weird things.
After those two years, I really did think the cheating was done. Dennis and I had met and married another hot 17 year old girl named Britni. We were a 3 way again and all was going very well. Britni later became the adult mega porno star, "BisexualBritni". After 300 adult movies, she was named the 2002 adult actress of the year. We remained a 3 way for the next 7 years. I decided to take a job driving a bus for RTD in Denver. I drove a bus for about 6 months when, after work one day, I man named Mike Medina asked me to ride his bus with him as he had to make a trip up to Conifer. I rode with him and we chatted all the way up. When we stopped and all the people got off the bus, he walked over to where I was sitting and kissed me. I was shocked but did not fight it. When we got back do the garage, he said he was coming over to my place to watch a movie. He did not ask, he simply make the statement. Dennis and Britni were in LA making adult movies for the week. I was really nervous and hesitant but figured I could watch a movie and not have sex. I had no intentions of cheating again.
Mike was a small guy who suffered from "small man's complex". It made him very aggressive and sort of "tough". When he showed up at my house, he had a bottle of wine with him. We poured a glass of wine and started watching the movie. After a wopping 10 minutes, he gets up, walked over to me, sits/straddles me and says, "If you are not going to start this, then I am". He aggressively starts to kiss me and orders me to take my clothes off. At this point, I am scared as hell and I cannot believe I am in this position yet again. I do as he asks and to be quite honest, I am quite afraid of him at this point. He undresses and promptly has sex with me while calling me names like "whore", "slut" and "tramp" the entire time. It was the most degrading, painful and ugly sexual experience I have ever had. I felt horrible. He even finished in me, unprotected and that made it even worse. I walked Mike to his car and when were outside I made the mistake of leaning on his car. He snapped at me to "get off his car". I have never felt worse in my entire life. I had just cheated again and this time it was is my husband's very own home. I had been severely degraded by the guy I cheated with. After Mike left, I went inside and finished the bottle of wine. I got drunk and passed out. Of course, the next day, Mike shows up at my house to use my hot tub. I am scared and worried about what he might say and/or do so I let him in. I performed oral on him in my hot tub all the while he acts like I do not even matter.
Mike Medina so over powered me that the next day, for some reason I cannot explain, I sought out a a weak guy to dominate. I found that wimpy guy in a man named Dan Carrol. Also a driver at RTD. I pushed this guy into sex the same was Mike pushed me. Dan, however, after 4 straight days to a park near the RTD garage, never got it up once time. I became horribly upset with Dan and called the entire thing off after his 4th failure to perform.
It was about this time that I came up pregnant. I was very happy during my pregnancy and did not cheat one time. I was very content with my life and simply never pursued anyone. After the twins were born, I stayed home for almost a year. I was very happy and really figured now that I had kids, the cheating was over. Of course, my husband and Britni had no idea I had cheated already. I really did believe it was over. It wasn't.
I went back to work and immediately had two affairs. One with a married man named Millard Martinez and one with Martin Jackson. At this point, things were so bad I was once again having affairs on my affairs. I was seeing both men while denying seeing them respectively. I ended up having sex with Millard, in the middle of the night, in a car wash maintenance room. The nest day, I had sex with Martin in the back of his mini-van. Of course, Dennis and Britni were lied to each and every day during this time period.
Later that same year, around X mas time, I started seeing my supervisor, Benjamin Rodriguez. He was also very assertive and quite pushy. He was constantly trying to get me to have sex with him in the back office at RTD. I did it one time but it made me very uncomfortable. Later, using his job as my supervisor, he would assign me routes that he could stop in and see me after work. We would make out in his car and I would give him BJs before he went home to his wife. A week later, he pulled me off the schedule and ad me follow him to the La Quinta Hotel near the RTD main garage. We had sex there while I was supposed to be with my husband and children having X mas photos taken. I felt horrible about what I was doing but continued to do it. During this time frame, Ben had given me a secret cell phone so we could chat without our spouses ever finding out. The bad thing about this situation was it was the first situation at RTD that Dennis started to become aware of. He asked me to stop doing what I was doing. He begged me to. I just told him I was not doing anything and I was tired of being accused. When he pushed the issue, like any real addict feeling the drug being taken away, I picked up a steak knife and threatened him with it. I did not right in front of my children. When my husband pointed out the kids could see their Mom holding their dad at knifepoint my only comment was, "Who cares? They do not like me anyway". Do this day, I am shocked and embarrassed that I needed sex and attention so bad that I was willing to harm my kids in such a manner.
Right after my affair with Ben, I, myself, was promoted to a supervisory role. I told myself that it was time to grow up and stop playing these dangerous games. That lasted 3 weeks. I had been talking to a man named Chris Slagter before I got promoted. One day I am giving Chris a ride to his bus, a job a supervisor does, and he tells me he likes me. He gives me his home address. The next day, I take my new promotion, in a company car, on company time, and have sex with Chris, in his wife's bed during out lunch hour. The very next day I do it again. Now I am having sex with my married subordinates, and using my job to get it done. My addiction was just getting worse and worse. When I went to Chris' for a third encounter, his wife answered the door. So, Chris, being rather smooth, just introduces me to her and says I am there on company business. So, I sit on her porch talking to her and acting like I am not screwing her husband. My sickness was so severe, I did not even feel bad while she was treating me so nicely.
By this time, without even knowing it, I had become a joke at RTD. I was a married woman cheating right and left and RTD was abuzz with how much of a slut I was. The men at RTD had made a list of the things to do and say to get me in bed with them. I was the laughing stock and I did not even know, though I should have.
During all these affairs, I was seeing Clarence Osborn (OZ) the entire time. I would give him BJs in the back of busses, make out with him and later, give him BJs in my supervisor truck, on duty. I did not know it at the time, but this was the guy telling people how to get me into bed. He said he was my friend but he was out to harm me and I had no clue. Far from being my best friend, he was my worst enemy.
The end of RTD was coming if you have not guessed that yet. The last affair I had at RTD was with Dennis' best friend, Dan Graham. He used to hang out with Dennis, be his friend, then come see me at work for make sessions. Dennis caught on before we had sex and Dan pulled away. I BEGGED Dennis to let me go up and have sex with Dan, I even offered to trade my children for the opportunity. Yes, I actually told Dennis he could have the house and keep our sons if he did not prevent me from having sex with Dan. I promised not to even look for the kids and to stay totally away from them. My addiction was now in high gear and not unlike any 10 dollar crack whore, I was willing to trade my kids for a "fix" of what I needed.
At the same time I was seeing Dan, I was also seeing another supervisor named Bob Rafferty. He was like 65 years old but he was paying attention to me. I would make out with him in the elevators in Union Station and he would suck on my breasts while I was parked, in my company car, at his house, on company time. When it was coming to an end, I was seeing 5-6 guys at the same time. To say the least, the house of cards came down like it had been painted with a pressure washer.
At the very end, Dennis found Chris Slagter's phone number in my stuff at work. I had been sort of staying away from Chris as he always BEGGED for more sex. The reason I stopped seeing him is that sex with him never lasted more then a full minute and I got very little out of it. Chris kept inviting me to parties at his house so we could have sex again and I always declined. He was getting rather pushy about it. When I told Dennis about the constant invitations to parties, he told me to just call him and ask him to stop. Of course, Dennis knew nothing of the sexual affair I had with Chris. So, following his advice, I called Chris and told him I was a manager now and I could not attend his parties and to please stop asking. He agreed. Dennis was listening in on the other phone. Just as we were about to hang up, Chris says, "I guess we will just forget about what happened 18 months ago". Dennis knew what Chris was talking about and questioned me about it after the call. I denied knowing anything and said I had no idea why he said that. Dennis told me to call Chris back and tell him he knew of the affair and see how Chris reacted. I started to dial the phone but I knew Chris was not prepared for this and he would give it all away. I hung up the phone before completing the number and in the next 10 seconds, destroyed my husband's life. I told him of all my affairs, not just the one with Chris. He was crushed and destroyed.
Dennis called Chris back himself and Chris apologized. Chris told us his wife already knew. Thinking she already knew, we headed over to her house as Dennis thought that since I knew her, I owed her an apology. Well, Chris had lied. His wife didn't know. Later that night, Chris called me and threatened to kill me and my kids for telling his wife. At this point, I had to involve the cops and they involved RTD. My job at RTD was about to dry up. After the investigation started, my so called best friend, Clarence Osborn, made the wonderful comment, "That slut had this coming". He tore my heart out with that remark.
Now I am not longer employed by RTD however, the guys that got outed during the investigation were not about to let this go. My house was vandalized, as well as my car. I was harassed via the phone and text messages. They sent my husband adult E cards telling him how much they enjoyed nailing me in his house. The tormented me to the point e had to move to California for a year. They called themselves the DTFM or "Drivers that Fucked Michelle" club.
Once in California, I started going to Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA). I saw doctors and even spent some time in an inpatient addiction center. Sadly, there are no places that specialize in female sex addiction though there are hundreds for male sex addicts. I spent a month in an inpatient treatment center called Del Amo and all I managed to do was have sex with several of the girls I roomed with and even one nurse who it seemed was just as sexually addicted as I was. Birds of a feather I guess. Sex addicts seem to be able to spot other sex addicts. It is kink of weird. So, here I am, I know my life is destroyed, my husband is filing for divorce, I am an inpatient and what I am doing? Sticking my tongue in other patients and my nurse. Would I ever learn? It was starting to seem that I never would.
During my time in California, I did try to stay loyal to Dennis and Britni. But as I fought my sexual urges I found myself getting violent. I was jailed twice for physically assaulting Britni, once with a gun. I was even locked up once on a 72 hour psych hold for having a fight with a LAPD officer. I hit her hard enough for her to fall and was quite lucky they hospitalized me instead of pressing charges. Later, I met another girl online and when Dennis tired to stop the affair, I attacked him with a box cutter, then tried to cut my wrists then tried to jump out the 3rd floor window. Once again I offered him our children if he just let me go see this girl and have sex with her.
After that fiasco and being in jail, I tried really hard to curb my sexual activities. I was not having sex but I was thinking about it constantly. Every man or woman I met I sized up sexually. AS I felt myself losing control of it, I started tattooing my body in the hopes it would help. I am not quite sure what the mental state was but I know I was trying to fight actually have sex by simply putting the sexual slogans on my body. I tattooed "I swallow cum" and "I eat pussy" right on my breasts. Then inked "Cum slutt" and "I fuck" on my lower back. My next set of tattoos were "fuck my whore pussy" and "fuck my whore ass" on my hips. My last set of tattoos consisted of "fuck slut" on my vaginal lips, "cum in me" above my belly button, "for deposit only" over my vagina and a bright red A representing the Scarlet letter.
Currently I am doing rather well. I have been on several daytime talk shows such as Dr. Phil and Dr. Keith Ablow. I have done many radio spots and even been a guest speaker at Universities. I am doing everything I can to educate people about female sex addiction so that other women do not have to suffer in silence like I have. Society looks down on women when it comes to sex already. A female sex addict is just viewed as a whore and a slut and not a human being with an illness/disease.
So, let me introduce myself to you.... Hello, my name is Michelle and I am a sex addict.
Michelle Ormond
:D
This started as far back as my 12th birthday. I was having sex with some girls living on my street and my drive to do was more then I could deal with. Being with these girls sexually was on my mind from the time I woke up until the time I went to bed. Sadly, I lived in a horribly controlling Catholic home and had to hide even thinking about sex from my Mom and dad. One day, after having an especially good time with the girl who lived across the street, I went home and continued the fun myself. I was masturbating with my electric tooth brush and my Mom walked in on me. She was absolutely brutal about what she saw. I was forced to go upstairs and tell my father who then made me call my grandparents and tell them. As if that was not enough, I was taken right to church and pushed into a confessional. When this was all said and done, I felt so horribly guilty that I swore off my sexual feelings as evil forever. I was so upset, I washed vagina out with rubbing alcohol. To this day, I can recall how badly that burned. It hurt so bad I almost passed out.
Needless to say, my sexuality went under ground. I learned to hide every sexual thought, feeling and idea. This was a very complicated for a girl just starting puberty. Sex is all I thought about, as is the case with most teens. Unfortunately for me, the second I thought about sex is the same second the guilt and fear came in. So, the stage was set. Have sex but hide it, lie about it and deny it. Step 1 to any addiction. Also, as we all know, the more your not supposed to do something, the more you want to do it. Sex was quickly becoming the central focus of my entire life.
As this budding addiction and I entered high school, the problem really started to show it's ugly head. I was having sex almost daily with guys from school. I was having sex in cars, empty rooms in the school, at guys homes during lunch and any other place we could find. I was even letting guys take turns on me as early as 14 and 15 years old. I was incredibly excited about what I was doing but the guilt was killing me inside. I had to dam near develop a second personality to rid myself of the guilt. I was the good girl at home and in situations in which I was supposed to be "proper". Then, I would go to school and become a totally different person. I was so good at it that one life never crossed into the other. I had successfully split my personalities. As high school went on, my sexual activities became more and more aggressive. I skipped both my proms to simply go have sex. I was having sex with basically any girl and any guy that would sleep with me. I had no limitations to my sexual conduct. I was completely out of control.
After high school, I married the first guy that asked. Bill Tygart. Sadly, during this year long marriage I simply had no idea how to stop having sex with people. Not to mention my personality was so spit I did not even view having sex with my husband's friends as wrong. When I was with Bill, I was with Bill. When I was with other men, I was with other men. The two worlds never met one another. Tragically, Bill found out about what I was doing and killed himself. Of course, I was able to separate myself from having any responsibility in this and turned into his problem. "Only cowards commit suicide" is how I relieved myself of fault and blame. Fearing being alone and needing sex and approval, the day after the funeral I invited some old boyfriends to my house to keep me company. One of them was not an old boyfriend but rather a guy I had met at my wedding. His name was Dennis. He was married to a girl named Barbara. That night, I had sex with Dennis several times. One whole day after my husband killed himself for how I conducted myself and hear I am doing it again. Dennis and I dated for a few weeks then Dennis offered a three-way with his wife. I accepted the invitation and spent the weekend with them at their place. Her and I had awesome sex and our three-way sex was stellar. I decided to move in with Dennis and Barbara and be a full time 3 way. Six months later Dennis and Barbara divorced over money matters and I married Dennis.
About a year later Dennis and I met a really hot girl named Shawna Garlow. She was 17 and just beautiful. We both fell in love with her and we moved her in. We were a three-way for over five years. Sadly, this is also when my affairs started again. I got a job as a Denver Sheriff Officer and started the academy. Half way though I met a man named Oscar Ramos. A married man with a few kids. I started having sex with Oscar during lunch breaks and after work. To arrange this I was lying to Dennis and Shawna like a demon. I cheated and lied every day for a month. I knew I was risking my job but I never even considered stopping the affair until he asked me to leave Dennis and Shawna and move in with him. He was going to divorce his wife for me. Then the two worlds collided and I wanted out. Of course Oscar had no intention of stopping and became aggressive and violent with me. It all ended with him pushing my car off the road and us drawing guns on one another. To say the least, I was out of a job that day. My first really good job pissed away to have sex with people I did not even especially like. Dennis and Shawna stood by during this time of court battles and media attention and I am not entirely sure why.
After the Denver Sheriff department, I got a job as a 911 dispatcher. Of course, I had hoped that my affairs were over. After all, one husband had killed himself already and the second husband was already horribly hurt by my affair with Oscar. No one would continue with this insanity right? WRONG. As a dispatcher, I started affairs with two people at the same time in the same office. Of course, I was lying to Dennis and Shawna about having sex at work again and I was lying to both people at work about the other. I was having sex with a girl named Michelle Morris and a guy named "rader". It is not hard to predict that these affairs went bad and the job exploded once again. Now I was explaining to Dennis and Michelle about yet another set of affairs. At this point, Shawna pretty much left. She was done with the lies and troubles. Dennis stayed married to me for some reason I cannot fully explain.
I did not work for the next 2 years. I just stayed home and did occasional adult type jobs such as videos, live cams and even the occasional escort call. None of this was cheating as Dennis knew and was OK with the idea. This is really the hard part to explain. Dennis was never sexually possessive of me. I have NEVER needed to cheat. Dennis would have allowed me to have sex with anyone I wanted to. I needed only ask. Why risk cheating when you can just ask? I have no idea. Addictions are weird things.
After those two years, I really did think the cheating was done. Dennis and I had met and married another hot 17 year old girl named Britni. We were a 3 way again and all was going very well. Britni later became the adult mega porno star, "BisexualBritni". After 300 adult movies, she was named the 2002 adult actress of the year. We remained a 3 way for the next 7 years. I decided to take a job driving a bus for RTD in Denver. I drove a bus for about 6 months when, after work one day, I man named Mike Medina asked me to ride his bus with him as he had to make a trip up to Conifer. I rode with him and we chatted all the way up. When we stopped and all the people got off the bus, he walked over to where I was sitting and kissed me. I was shocked but did not fight it. When we got back do the garage, he said he was coming over to my place to watch a movie. He did not ask, he simply make the statement. Dennis and Britni were in LA making adult movies for the week. I was really nervous and hesitant but figured I could watch a movie and not have sex. I had no intentions of cheating again.
Mike was a small guy who suffered from "small man's complex". It made him very aggressive and sort of "tough". When he showed up at my house, he had a bottle of wine with him. We poured a glass of wine and started watching the movie. After a wopping 10 minutes, he gets up, walked over to me, sits/straddles me and says, "If you are not going to start this, then I am". He aggressively starts to kiss me and orders me to take my clothes off. At this point, I am scared as hell and I cannot believe I am in this position yet again. I do as he asks and to be quite honest, I am quite afraid of him at this point. He undresses and promptly has sex with me while calling me names like "whore", "slut" and "tramp" the entire time. It was the most degrading, painful and ugly sexual experience I have ever had. I felt horrible. He even finished in me, unprotected and that made it even worse. I walked Mike to his car and when were outside I made the mistake of leaning on his car. He snapped at me to "get off his car". I have never felt worse in my entire life. I had just cheated again and this time it was is my husband's very own home. I had been severely degraded by the guy I cheated with. After Mike left, I went inside and finished the bottle of wine. I got drunk and passed out. Of course, the next day, Mike shows up at my house to use my hot tub. I am scared and worried about what he might say and/or do so I let him in. I performed oral on him in my hot tub all the while he acts like I do not even matter.
Mike Medina so over powered me that the next day, for some reason I cannot explain, I sought out a a weak guy to dominate. I found that wimpy guy in a man named Dan Carrol. Also a driver at RTD. I pushed this guy into sex the same was Mike pushed me. Dan, however, after 4 straight days to a park near the RTD garage, never got it up once time. I became horribly upset with Dan and called the entire thing off after his 4th failure to perform.
It was about this time that I came up pregnant. I was very happy during my pregnancy and did not cheat one time. I was very content with my life and simply never pursued anyone. After the twins were born, I stayed home for almost a year. I was very happy and really figured now that I had kids, the cheating was over. Of course, my husband and Britni had no idea I had cheated already. I really did believe it was over. It wasn't.
I went back to work and immediately had two affairs. One with a married man named Millard Martinez and one with Martin Jackson. At this point, things were so bad I was once again having affairs on my affairs. I was seeing both men while denying seeing them respectively. I ended up having sex with Millard, in the middle of the night, in a car wash maintenance room. The nest day, I had sex with Martin in the back of his mini-van. Of course, Dennis and Britni were lied to each and every day during this time period.
Later that same year, around X mas time, I started seeing my supervisor, Benjamin Rodriguez. He was also very assertive and quite pushy. He was constantly trying to get me to have sex with him in the back office at RTD. I did it one time but it made me very uncomfortable. Later, using his job as my supervisor, he would assign me routes that he could stop in and see me after work. We would make out in his car and I would give him BJs before he went home to his wife. A week later, he pulled me off the schedule and ad me follow him to the La Quinta Hotel near the RTD main garage. We had sex there while I was supposed to be with my husband and children having X mas photos taken. I felt horrible about what I was doing but continued to do it. During this time frame, Ben had given me a secret cell phone so we could chat without our spouses ever finding out. The bad thing about this situation was it was the first situation at RTD that Dennis started to become aware of. He asked me to stop doing what I was doing. He begged me to. I just told him I was not doing anything and I was tired of being accused. When he pushed the issue, like any real addict feeling the drug being taken away, I picked up a steak knife and threatened him with it. I did not right in front of my children. When my husband pointed out the kids could see their Mom holding their dad at knifepoint my only comment was, "Who cares? They do not like me anyway". Do this day, I am shocked and embarrassed that I needed sex and attention so bad that I was willing to harm my kids in such a manner.
Right after my affair with Ben, I, myself, was promoted to a supervisory role. I told myself that it was time to grow up and stop playing these dangerous games. That lasted 3 weeks. I had been talking to a man named Chris Slagter before I got promoted. One day I am giving Chris a ride to his bus, a job a supervisor does, and he tells me he likes me. He gives me his home address. The next day, I take my new promotion, in a company car, on company time, and have sex with Chris, in his wife's bed during out lunch hour. The very next day I do it again. Now I am having sex with my married subordinates, and using my job to get it done. My addiction was just getting worse and worse. When I went to Chris' for a third encounter, his wife answered the door. So, Chris, being rather smooth, just introduces me to her and says I am there on company business. So, I sit on her porch talking to her and acting like I am not screwing her husband. My sickness was so severe, I did not even feel bad while she was treating me so nicely.
By this time, without even knowing it, I had become a joke at RTD. I was a married woman cheating right and left and RTD was abuzz with how much of a slut I was. The men at RTD had made a list of the things to do and say to get me in bed with them. I was the laughing stock and I did not even know, though I should have.
During all these affairs, I was seeing Clarence Osborn (OZ) the entire time. I would give him BJs in the back of busses, make out with him and later, give him BJs in my supervisor truck, on duty. I did not know it at the time, but this was the guy telling people how to get me into bed. He said he was my friend but he was out to harm me and I had no clue. Far from being my best friend, he was my worst enemy.
The end of RTD was coming if you have not guessed that yet. The last affair I had at RTD was with Dennis' best friend, Dan Graham. He used to hang out with Dennis, be his friend, then come see me at work for make sessions. Dennis caught on before we had sex and Dan pulled away. I BEGGED Dennis to let me go up and have sex with Dan, I even offered to trade my children for the opportunity. Yes, I actually told Dennis he could have the house and keep our sons if he did not prevent me from having sex with Dan. I promised not to even look for the kids and to stay totally away from them. My addiction was now in high gear and not unlike any 10 dollar crack whore, I was willing to trade my kids for a "fix" of what I needed.
At the same time I was seeing Dan, I was also seeing another supervisor named Bob Rafferty. He was like 65 years old but he was paying attention to me. I would make out with him in the elevators in Union Station and he would suck on my breasts while I was parked, in my company car, at his house, on company time. When it was coming to an end, I was seeing 5-6 guys at the same time. To say the least, the house of cards came down like it had been painted with a pressure washer.
At the very end, Dennis found Chris Slagter's phone number in my stuff at work. I had been sort of staying away from Chris as he always BEGGED for more sex. The reason I stopped seeing him is that sex with him never lasted more then a full minute and I got very little out of it. Chris kept inviting me to parties at his house so we could have sex again and I always declined. He was getting rather pushy about it. When I told Dennis about the constant invitations to parties, he told me to just call him and ask him to stop. Of course, Dennis knew nothing of the sexual affair I had with Chris. So, following his advice, I called Chris and told him I was a manager now and I could not attend his parties and to please stop asking. He agreed. Dennis was listening in on the other phone. Just as we were about to hang up, Chris says, "I guess we will just forget about what happened 18 months ago". Dennis knew what Chris was talking about and questioned me about it after the call. I denied knowing anything and said I had no idea why he said that. Dennis told me to call Chris back and tell him he knew of the affair and see how Chris reacted. I started to dial the phone but I knew Chris was not prepared for this and he would give it all away. I hung up the phone before completing the number and in the next 10 seconds, destroyed my husband's life. I told him of all my affairs, not just the one with Chris. He was crushed and destroyed.
Dennis called Chris back himself and Chris apologized. Chris told us his wife already knew. Thinking she already knew, we headed over to her house as Dennis thought that since I knew her, I owed her an apology. Well, Chris had lied. His wife didn't know. Later that night, Chris called me and threatened to kill me and my kids for telling his wife. At this point, I had to involve the cops and they involved RTD. My job at RTD was about to dry up. After the investigation started, my so called best friend, Clarence Osborn, made the wonderful comment, "That slut had this coming". He tore my heart out with that remark.
Now I am not longer employed by RTD however, the guys that got outed during the investigation were not about to let this go. My house was vandalized, as well as my car. I was harassed via the phone and text messages. They sent my husband adult E cards telling him how much they enjoyed nailing me in his house. The tormented me to the point e had to move to California for a year. They called themselves the DTFM or "Drivers that Fucked Michelle" club.
Once in California, I started going to Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA). I saw doctors and even spent some time in an inpatient addiction center. Sadly, there are no places that specialize in female sex addiction though there are hundreds for male sex addicts. I spent a month in an inpatient treatment center called Del Amo and all I managed to do was have sex with several of the girls I roomed with and even one nurse who it seemed was just as sexually addicted as I was. Birds of a feather I guess. Sex addicts seem to be able to spot other sex addicts. It is kink of weird. So, here I am, I know my life is destroyed, my husband is filing for divorce, I am an inpatient and what I am doing? Sticking my tongue in other patients and my nurse. Would I ever learn? It was starting to seem that I never would.
During my time in California, I did try to stay loyal to Dennis and Britni. But as I fought my sexual urges I found myself getting violent. I was jailed twice for physically assaulting Britni, once with a gun. I was even locked up once on a 72 hour psych hold for having a fight with a LAPD officer. I hit her hard enough for her to fall and was quite lucky they hospitalized me instead of pressing charges. Later, I met another girl online and when Dennis tired to stop the affair, I attacked him with a box cutter, then tried to cut my wrists then tried to jump out the 3rd floor window. Once again I offered him our children if he just let me go see this girl and have sex with her.
After that fiasco and being in jail, I tried really hard to curb my sexual activities. I was not having sex but I was thinking about it constantly. Every man or woman I met I sized up sexually. AS I felt myself losing control of it, I started tattooing my body in the hopes it would help. I am not quite sure what the mental state was but I know I was trying to fight actually have sex by simply putting the sexual slogans on my body. I tattooed "I swallow cum" and "I eat pussy" right on my breasts. Then inked "Cum slutt" and "I fuck" on my lower back. My next set of tattoos were "fuck my whore pussy" and "fuck my whore ass" on my hips. My last set of tattoos consisted of "fuck slut" on my vaginal lips, "cum in me" above my belly button, "for deposit only" over my vagina and a bright red A representing the Scarlet letter.
Currently I am doing rather well. I have been on several daytime talk shows such as Dr. Phil and Dr. Keith Ablow. I have done many radio spots and even been a guest speaker at Universities. I am doing everything I can to educate people about female sex addiction so that other women do not have to suffer in silence like I have. Society looks down on women when it comes to sex already. A female sex addict is just viewed as a whore and a slut and not a human being with an illness/disease.
So, let me introduce myself to you.... Hello, my name is Michelle and I am a sex addict.
Michelle Ormond
:D